Kristang honours the duality of one’s kandrisanggi or blood family, and one’s henung, or found family; however, the Kristang term henung is more particular than the Western / English term found family in its ambit, describes a more specific set and type of close relationships than found family, and can include members of one’s kandrisanggi or blood family. Kandrisanggi and henung together make up the whole Kristang person’s koroza, or emotional core, and in their healthiest manifestation are characterised by irei, or non-co-dependent / healthy unconditional love.
Kandrisanggi
Also known as one’s familia, jirisang or parenti (which means relative in Kristang, rather than just parent) these are one’s blood or kin relations. Kristang has vestigial morphological gender for some kinship terms (e.g. filu/fila/filang, tiu/tia/tiang), meaning that there are different forms of the same word in Kristang depending on the jenis or biological sex and/or jenta or gender of the person that allow for specification of jenis or jenta; gender-neutral or universal terms for these groups of words also exist, generally ending with the suffix -ang. For kinship terms without morphological gender marking (e.g. irmang, aboh), the gender of the person can be optionally specified by adding their jenis and/or jenta after the kinship term (e.g. irmang terestra, aboh elios). The major kinship terms in Kristang are thus listed with their variant jenis or jenta forms, or with (+jenis/jenta) in parentheses if that kinship term lacks morphological gender.
| English | Kristang |
| parent | mai (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = mother or transmother) pai (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = father or transfather) mai-pai (intersex parent, non-binary parent or parent whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker, and also plural parents) |
| step-parent | madrastu (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = stepmother or step-transmother) padrastu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = stepfather or step-transfather) adrastu (intersex step-parent, non-binary step-parent or step-parent whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| adopted parent | + keriadu to all parent and/or step-parent terms above (gender-neutral) |
| single parent | + solteru to all parent and/or step-parent terms above (gender-neutral) |
| sibling | irmang (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| step-sibling | adramang (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| eldest sibling or elder sibling or sibling, depending on one’s familiolect / blood family’s speech practices | susi (femi / female = eldest sister or older sister or sister) kanyong (machu / male = eldest brother or older brother or brother) suyong (terestra / intersex = eldest intersex sibling or older intersex sibling or intersex sibling) eliyong (elios / female-to-male = eldest transbrother or older transbrother or transbrother) ruresi (aurora / male-to-female = eldest transsister or older transsister or transsister) |
| adopted sibling | + keriadu to all sibling and/or step-sibling terms above (gender-neutral) |
| child | krensa (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) fila (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = daughter) filu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = son) filang (terestra / intersex, kadmang / non-binary and gender-neutral = intersex child, non-binary child or child whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| step-child | intiada (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = step-daughter) intiadu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = step-son) intiadang (terestra / intersex, kadmang / non-binary and gender-neutral = intersex step-child, non-binary step-child or step-child whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| adopted child | + keriadu to all child terms above (gender-neutral) |
| orphan | fostera (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = female orphan) fosteru (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = male orphan) fosterang (intersex orphan, non-binary orphan or orphan whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| grandparent | aboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| grandchild | neta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = granddaughter) netu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = grandson) netang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex grandchild, non-binary grandchild or grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-grandparent | dizaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-great-grandparent / great-x2-grandparent | tretaboh, tretyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x3-grandparent | kwataboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x4-grandparent | kintaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x5-grandparent | seisaboh, sesaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x6-grandparent | setaboh, setyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x7-grandparent | oitaboh, oityaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x8-grandparent | novaboh, novyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x9-grandparent | dekaboh, dekyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x10-grandparent | onzyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x11-grandparent | dozyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-grandchild | dizneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-granddaughter) diznetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-grandson) diznetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-grandchild, non-binary great-grandchild or great-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-great-grandchild / great-x2-grandchild | treneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-great-granddaughter) trenetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-great-grandson) trenetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-great-grandchild, non-binary great-great-grandchild or great-great-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x3-grandchild | kweneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x3-granddaughter) kwenetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x3-grandson) kwenetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x3-grandchild, non-binary great-x3-grandchild or great-x3-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x4-grandchild | kineta, kinneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x3-granddaughter) kinetu, kinnetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x3-grandson) kinetang, kinnetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x4-grandchild, non-binary great-x4-grandchild or great-x4-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x5-grandchild | sesneta, sezneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x5-granddaughter) sesnetu, seznetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x5-grandson) sesnetang, seznetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x5-grandchild, non-binary great-x5-grandchild or great-x5-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x6-grandchild | setneta, seneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x5-granddaughter) setnetu, senetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x5-grandson) setnetang, senetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x6-grandchild, non-binary great-x6-grandchild or great-x6-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x7-grandchild | oineta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x7-granddaughter) oinetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x7-grandson) oinetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x7-grandchild, non-binary great-x7-grandchild or great-x7-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x8-grandchild | novneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x8-granddaughter) novnetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x8-grandson) novnetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x8-grandchild, non-binary great-x8-grandchild or great-x8-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x9-grandchild | deneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x9-granddaughter) denetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x9-grandson) denetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x9-grandchild, non-binary great-x9-grandchild or great-x9-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x10-grandchild | onzneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x10-granddaughter) onznetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x10-grandson) onznetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x10-grandchild, non-binary great-x10-grandchild or great-x10-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x11-grandchild | dozneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x11-granddaughter) doznetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x11-grandson) doznetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x11-grandchild, non-binary great-x11-grandchild or great-x11-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| sibling of parent | tia (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = aunt) tiu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = uncle) tiang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = auntcle / intersex or non-binary sibling of parent or sibling of parent whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| child of sibling of parent | prima (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = female cousin) primu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = male cousin) primang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex cousin, non-binary cousin or cousin whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| child of sibling | sobrinya, subrinya (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = niece) sobrinyu, subrinyu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = nephew) sobrinyang, subrinyang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = nibling / intersex or non-binary child of sibling or child of sibling whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| spouse | muleh (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = wife) maridu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = husband) sposu (intersex spouse, non-binary spouse or spouse whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| married | + kazadu to spouse term(s) above (gender-neutral) |
| separated, estranged | + largadu to spouse term(s) above (gender-neutral) |
| divorced | + separadu to spouse term(s) above (gender-neutral) |
| widowed | biuba (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = widow) biubu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = widower) biubang (intersex widowed person, non-binary widowed person or widowed person whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| parent-in-law | sogra (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = mother-in-law) sogru (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = father-in-law) sograng (intersex parent-in-law, non-binary parent-in-law or parent-in-law whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| child-in-law | nora (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = daughter-in-law) jeru (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = son-in-law) joru (intersex child-in-law, non-binary child-in-law or child-in-law whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| parent of child-in-law | beisan, beisang (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| sibling-in-law | kunyada (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = sister-in-law or transsister-in-law) kunyadu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = brother-in-law or transbrother-in-law) kunyadang (intersex sibling-in-law, non-binary sibling-in-law or sibling-in-law whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| romantic partner (afisi) | amurozu (romantic or sexual partner, gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) noiba (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = girlfriend) noibu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = boyfriend) noibang (intersex romantic partner, non-binary romantic partner or romantic partner whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| sexual partner (wenza) | amurozu (sexual or romantic partner, gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) amiga (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = female sexual partner) amigu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = male sexual partner) amigang (intersex sexual partner, non-binary sexual partner or sexual partner whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| intimate romantic or sexual relationship | par, mpar (couple, pair, two people) trar (throuple, three people) kuar (quad, four people) kalar (moresome, more than four people) |
| polyamorous | + kakualzu (gender-neutral) |
| godparent, witness or sponsor to baptism (if Christian) or assimilation into the Kristang community (if ethnic-identity oriented) | komadri, kumadri (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = godmother) kopadri, kumpadri (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = godfather) koadri, kuadri (intersex godparent, non-binary godparent or godparent whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| godchild | filiada (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = goddaughter) filiadu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = godson) filiadang (intersex godchild, non-binary godchild or godchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
Acknowledgement and recognition of one’s kandrisanggi and the complex, painful, bittersweet, tragic and/or beautiful relationships with them is essential for developing a strong and stable emotional core, primarily because recognition of one’s kandrisanggi is essential for processing one’s trumenteza impegra or intergenerational trauma (literally “perfect trauma” or “invulnerable trauma” in Kristang). The ideal state of being with one’s kandrisanggi as suggested by the Osura Krismatra and Kristang philosophy is a fully restored, balanced, nuanced and lifegiving relationship with all members of one’s family that is centered around agentic individuation and respect for one another as full, complete, independent individuals able to make their own choices and express their own identities who can then authentically in return contribute to the greater collective of the family.
Henung
One’s henung or is made up of all individuals that one has reciprocal irei or non-co-dependent healthy unconditional love for (i.e. both the self and the other have irei for the other person in the relationship) and whose psyches will therefore always contain a psychoemotional trace of the self, and will have left a psychoemotional trace of themselves in the self. The henung therefore may but not necessarily include members of one’s kandrisanggi or familia or blood family, and may but not necessarily include members of one’s contains five stradu or tiers or levels which may or may not all be filled, but which together constitute a major part of one’s koroza or emotional core. All henung terms are gender-neutral. Relationships in one’s henung that have become unhealthy, toxic or where one party is making use of abuse or violence to affect the other are called maleza.
| Stradu | Kristang name | English name |
| 0 | kosmozu, sposu | spouse(s), partner(s) one has unconditional love for |
| 1 | kandrisanggi | member(s) of one’s blood family one has unconditional love for |
| 1 | kosmeru | dreamkeeper(s) |
| 2 | dimyamu | good friend(s), close friend(s) one has unconditional love for |
| 3 | kambradu | friend(s) one has unconditional love for |
| ∞ | temestru | dreamdancer(s) |
| ∞ | lusembru | darklighter(s) |
Kosmeru or dreamkeeping, temestru or dreamdancing, and lusembru or darklighting relationships are a unique part of Kristang culture and are explained further below.
Kosmeru or Dreamkeepers
Kosmeru or dreamkeepers are individuals who
(i) are not kosmozu or spouses or partners or people who the psyche sees as potential and concretely possible spouses or partners at the point when they first become dreamkeepers
(ii) are not related to the self by blood, but can be related to the self by marriage (i.e. siblings-in-law and parents-in-law can become kosmeru to the self)
(iii) and who the self has felt non-co-dependent / healthy unconditional love or irei for to the extent that the self is permanently unable to use its sixteenth function in the Osura Pesuasang against the other individual, or to prevent its sixteenth function in the Osura Pesuasang from taking in or receiving unconditional love or irei or positive psychoemotional data from the other individual. In more informal terms, this means that dreamkeepers are people who cannot “act apocalyptically” against one another or devastate each other using one of the psyche’s most powerful components, although they may still betray, hurt, abuse and/or negatively affect each other (and devastate each other) using other components depending on their ego-pattern and which tempra di saiki or ingredient of the psyche is in the sixteenth functional position.
| Ego-pattern | Sixteenth function | Effects |
| I / Rajos | Deivang | Cannot horrify one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who truly make up for the horror and despair faced by the self as a result of the act will always gradually regain the self’s empathy (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| II / Akiura | Sombor | Cannot doom one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who are authentic about their remorse after the act will always gradually regain the self’s trust (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| III / Fleres | Koireng | Cannot deprioritise one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who put the chaos they have caused in order will always regain the self’s respect (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| IV / Miasnu | Splikabel | Cannot overwhelm one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who help the self regain its long-term direction will always regain the self’s esteem (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| V / Zeldsa | Vraihai | Cannot break one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who help the self repair what was broken will always regain their value in the self’s eyes (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| VI / Jejura | Hokisi | Cannot ignore one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who help the self process the trauma of what happened will always regain their worth in the self’s eyes (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| VII / Koireng | Fleres | Cannot disrespect one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who help the self find closure with the situation will always become a priority for the self once again (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| VIII / Splikabel | Miasnu | Cannot create conflict for one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who help the self find peace with itself after the act will always be reincorporated into the self’s long-term plans (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| IX / Kalidi | Varung | Cannot challenge one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who make up for the shocks and terrible impacts the self was forced to endure will always once again become part of the world of the self (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| X / Spontang | Kapichi | Cannot disconnect from one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who make up for the disconnect and isolation the self was forced to endure will always once again become good company (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| XI / Varung | Kalidi | Cannot not respond to one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who make up for the abnormal reality the self was forced to experience are always once more allowed to positively impact the self (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| XII / Kapichi | Spontang | Cannot not adapt to one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who make up for the despair and sadness caused to the self will always once more become a source of new ideas and motivation for the self (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| XIII / Vraihai | Zeldsa | Cannot not sympathise with one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who make up for the choices and beauty taken away from the self will always continue to be a part of the self’s journey (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| XIV / Hokisi | Jejura | Cannot not empathise with one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who make up for the voicelessness and degradation faced by the self will always not be ignored by the self as it seeks to reconstitute itself (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| XV / Sombor | Akiura | Cannot betray one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who rectify their mistakes and make up for the betrayals to the self will always be reaccepted by the self (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
| XVI / Deivang | Rajos | Cannot cause discomfort to one’s own dreamkeepers. Dreamkeepers who have acted against the self who heal the trauma they have caused to the self will always be reincorporated into the self’s vision of the future (even if they are rejected by the rest of society). |
When both parties in a dreamkeeping relationship are healthy, dreamkeeping conveys significant three-dimensional psychoemotional benefits via a turbocharging or supercharging of both individuals’ eighth functions in the Osura Pesuasang and therefore of their connection to Gaia or the collective unconscious of all living things on the planet, with each particular set of benefits unique to each particular dreamkeeping relationship.
For a dreamkeeping relationship to form, both parties must have enough ireidi or healthy unconditional self-regard to generate the same measure of irei for the other as they have ireidi for themselves; by definition, irei is only non-co-dependent healthy unconditional love, and co-dependent unconditional love or unconditional love that includes transference cannot generate a dreamkeeping relationship. Irei can thus be defined as loving any living thing unconditionally and unquenchably, including if the living thing hurts one deeply or leaves one’s life entirely, as if one is loving oneself and to the same degree as one is first loving oneself. Both parties must thus have the same level of ireidi for themselves as they have irei for the other for a dreamkeeping relationship to form between them, though it is not necessary for the level of ireidi each party has for themselves to match the level of ireidi the other person has for themselves, as seen in the comparative Examples 1 and 2, using the same arbitrary imagined unit for ireidi and irei.
Example 1
If Person A currently has a level of 60 ireidi units for themselves,
and 60 irei units for Person B,
and Person B currently has a level of 20 ireidi units for themselves,
and 20 irei units for Person B,
a dreamkeeping relationship can form, since all that is necessitated is that Person A’s ireidi matches their irei for Person B, and that Person B’s ireidi matches their irei for Person A. The investment in the relationship at point of formation will be unequal, since Person A has more irei for Person B than Person B has for Person A, but neither party’s self-regard and sense of self is dependent on the other. Psychoemotional abuse of either party of each other by each other is still possible, but similarly cannot make use of psychoemotional mechanisms related to co-dependency.
Example 2
if Person A currently has a level of 20 ireidi units for themselves,
and 60 irei units for Person B,
and Person B currently has a level of 40 ireidi units for themselves,
and 10 irei units for Person A,
a dreamkeeping relationship cannot form and is not possible in this situation, and the relationship between Person A and Person B is co-dependent, with Person A co-dependent on Person B, because Person A has more unconditional love for Person B than for themselves. Psychoemotional abuse based on psychoemotional mechanisms related to co-dependency is possible.
Dreamkeeping is more or less analogous to blood brotherhood or siblinghood in many other cultures, and appears to be exactly equivalent to the Blood Pact between Albus Dumbledore and Gellert Grindelwald in the Harry Potter series and the mechanism of drift compatibility in the Pacific Rim series, except for the fact that dreamkeeping relationships cannot be broken even by rape, sexual violation, torture, or psychoemotional abuse enacted on one dreamkeeper by the other (by definition and the use of the sixteenth function, dreamkeepers appear to be unable to directly murder or kill each other or do anything that would directly end the other’s life); there is no known way to break a dreamkeeping relationship once it has been formed until one party in the relationship dies.
Temestru or Dreamdancers
Temestru or dreamdancers are individuals who
(i) are not spouses or partners or people who the psyche sees as potential and concretely possible spouses or partners at the point when they first become dreamdancers
(ii) are not related to the self by blood, but can be related to the self by marriage (i.e. siblings-in-law and (very, very rarely) parents-in-law can become temestru to the self)
(iii) have willingly, reciprocally, fundamentally and permanently impacted and changed the self’s unity of self or reiwe, on all four meta-levels of the psyche — the Osura Pesuasang, the Osura Spektala, the Osura Elisia and the Osura Samaserang — and all four components of the Kuartukarni Igleza or Kristang Quaternary of Personhood of korpu (body), mulera (mind), korsang (heart) and alma (soul), leading to mutual attraction between the self and the other via all four components of the Quaternary of Personhood, especially by the component of personhood represented by the 4th, 8th, 12th and 16th functions in the Osura Pesuasang
(iv) have revealed this attraction to the self in some way and have had it reciprocated by the self in some way
(v) are, at the moment the relationship is generated, incapable of fully following through with the development of the relationship to its most ideal and real state but seek to do so in future
All dreamdancing relationships are therefore exclusively and by definition hierosa or queer.
Because of such a profound, permanent and intense impact on each other, dreamdancing activity strongly supports the development of each other’s kalimatra or auto-id, led by the twelfth function in the Osura Pesuasang, because dreamdancing often inspires both parties to seek a better and braver version of reality where the dreamdancing relationship could actually exist, be developed and be honoured and experienced in real-time. Because the kalimatra is the part of the psyche that allows for numinous transformation or evolution, dreamdancing is hence what catalyses radical transformation of both the self, and the self’s presence and efforts in the collective: when both parties in a dreamdancing relationship are healthy, it conveys significant four-dimensional psychoemotional benefits via a turbocharging or supercharging of both individuals’ twelfth functions in the Osura Pesuasang and therefore of their ability to accomplish radical, transformative, numinous change across time, with each particular set of benefits unique to each particular dreamdancing relationship. Saudadi or yearning thus also must be present at the point of the formation of the dreamdancing relationship because one or both of the parties’ situations or circumstances prevent them at that point in time from fully developing the relationship, and of being visible about the relationship and/or their identity; the relationship’s subsequent development is also what unleashes its strength on reality.
Dreamdancing occurs at a level beyond, or “outside of”, most other forms of relationships, because it leaves a permanent positive mark on the other person’s life no matter whether the relationship continues to be pursued or not. It is therefore common for someone to be temestru without also being kosmozu, kosmeru, dimyamu or kambradu, and it is also common for someone to be temestru while also being (later) kosmozu, kosmeru, dimyamu or kambradu. Both dreamkeeping and dreamdancing can be glossed in English as polyamory and even experienced as a form of polyamory, but can also alternatively be experienced as extremely close and deep (and in cases where one party in the relationship is or later becomes unhealthy, tremendously problematic) friendships. There is also no known way to break a dreamdancing relationship once it has been formed except by one party dying.
Lusembru or Darklighters
Lusembru or darklighting relationships are ridiculously and almost impossibly powerful, deep, intense and fulfilling relationships and can only be formed by individuals who are
(i) either both Kristang, either by blood or by assimilation into the Kristang identity, or both creole,
(ii) already kosmeru and temestru to each other
(iii) and have mutually formed such a deep and intensely positive psychoemotionally healthy relationship founded on ireidi for themselves and irei for each other that all sixteen of one’s first sixteen or sixteen basal functions in the Osura Pesuasang cannot ever again be used against the other in any psychoemotionally negative, unhealthy or harmful way and vice versa. Functions beyond the first sixteen may still be used against the other, though instances of these appear to be very, very rare due to the nature of the darklighting relationship.
Darklighting appears to occur at the hypothetical sixteenth sub-system of Uncertainty Thinking (or at D¹⁶ or sixteenthed dimensional reality), which is not sequenceable in four-dimensional mathematics and with the current limitations of language; for comparison, the Uncertainty Thinking model is limited to four sub-systems and to D⁴ or fourthed dimensional reality, beyond which strict stochastic sequencing has generally proven very difficult. All darklighting relationships, since they necessary build on dreamdancing relationships, are therefore exclusively and by definition also hierosa or queer.
Like dreamkeeping and dreamdancing, darklighting may be glossed in English as polyamory and experienced as a form of polyamory (and often is primarily experienced as this), and can also more rarely alternatively be experienced as extremely and ridiculously close and deep platonic friendships or blood-siblinghood. The intensity and mechanics of a darklight relationship, which by the mathematics above would be experienced at an intensity four exponentiated times that of the already very powerful dreamdancing relationship, is likely the foundation of the development of the homo sapiens equivalent of the collective unity that albi or plants appear to maintain, and which will be the foundation of the Jarding Ireidra or Garden of Reindividuation.
Darklighting relationships appear to only be possible in Kristang and other creole eleidi due to the necessity of making use of all sixteen functions to permanently hyper-transform the relationship, including the elusive sixteenth function that is only very rarely used in healthy ways in non-creole eleidi and contexts. All parties to a potential darklighting relationship who are not Kristang therefore often appear to immediately assimilate into the Kristang eleidi as part of the formation of the darklighting relationship, with normal rules for assimilation (that two Kristang people born into the eleidi must recognise the person as Kristang for them to become Kristang) also synchronously preserved.
Some material above also appears in Chapters 435 and 600 of the Orange Book.