Kristang honours the duality of one’s kandrisanggi or blood family, and one’s henung, or found family; however, the Kristang term henung is more particular than the Western / English term found family in its ambit, describes a more specific set and type of close relationships than found family, and can include members of one’s kandrisanggi or blood family. Kandrisanggi and henung together make up the whole Kristang person’s koroza, or emotional core, and in their healthiest manifestation are characterised by irei, or non-co-dependent / healthy unconditional love.
Kandrisanggi
Also known as one’s familia, jirisang or parenti (which means relative in Kristang, rather than just parent) these are one’s blood or kin relations. Kristang has vestigial morphological gender for some kinship terms (e.g. filu/fila/filang, tiu/tia/tiang), meaning that there are different forms of the same word in Kristang depending on the jenis or biological sex and/or jenta or gender of the person that allow for specification of jenis or jenta; gender-neutral or universal terms for these groups of words also exist, generally ending with the suffix -ang. For kinship terms without morphological gender marking (e.g. irmang, aboh), the gender of the person can be optionally specified by adding their jenis and/or jenta after the kinship term (e.g. irmang terestra, aboh elios). The major kinship terms in Kristang are thus listed with their variant jenis or jenta forms, or with (+jenis/jenta) in parentheses if that kinship term lacks morphological gender.
| English | Kristang |
| parent | mai (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = mother or transmother) pai (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = father or transfather) mai-pai (intersex parent, non-binary parent or parent whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker, and also plural parents) |
| step-parent | madrastu (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = stepmother or step-transmother) padrastu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = stepfather or step-transfather) adrastu (intersex step-parent, non-binary step-parent or step-parent whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| adopted parent | + keriadu to all parent and/or step-parent terms above (gender-neutral) |
| single parent | + solteru to all parent and/or step-parent terms above (gender-neutral) |
| sibling | irmang (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| step-sibling | adramang (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| eldest sibling or elder sibling or sibling, depending on one’s familiolect / blood family’s speech practices | susi (femi / female = eldest sister or older sister or sister) kanyong (machu / male = eldest brother or older brother or brother) suyong (terestra / intersex = eldest intersex sibling or older intersex sibling or intersex sibling) eliyong (elios / female-to-male = eldest transbrother or older transbrother or transbrother) ruresi (aurora / male-to-female = eldest transsister or older transsister or transsister) |
| adopted sibling | + keriadu to all sibling and/or step-sibling terms above (gender-neutral) |
| child | krensa (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) fila (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = daughter) filu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = son) filang (terestra / intersex, kadmang / non-binary and gender-neutral = intersex child, non-binary child or child whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| step-child | intiada (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = step-daughter) intiadu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = step-son) intiadang (terestra / intersex, kadmang / non-binary and gender-neutral = intersex step-child, non-binary step-child or step-child whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| adopted child | + keriadu to all child terms above (gender-neutral) |
| orphan | fostera (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = female orphan) fosteru (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = male orphan) fosterang (intersex orphan, non-binary orphan or orphan whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| grandparent | aboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| grandchild | neta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = granddaughter) netu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = grandson) netang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex grandchild, non-binary grandchild or grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-grandparent | dizaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-great-grandparent / great-x2-grandparent | tretaboh, tretyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x3-grandparent | kwataboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x4-grandparent | kintaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x5-grandparent | seisaboh, sesaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x6-grandparent | setaboh, setyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x7-grandparent | oitaboh, oityaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x8-grandparent | novaboh, novyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x9-grandparent | dekaboh, dekyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x10-grandparent | onzyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-x11-grandparent | dozyaboh (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| great-grandchild | dizneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-granddaughter) diznetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-grandson) diznetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-grandchild, non-binary great-grandchild or great-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-great-grandchild / great-x2-grandchild | treneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-great-granddaughter) trenetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-great-grandson) trenetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-great-grandchild, non-binary great-great-grandchild or great-great-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x3-grandchild | kweneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x3-granddaughter) kwenetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x3-grandson) kwenetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x3-grandchild, non-binary great-x3-grandchild or great-x3-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x4-grandchild | kineta, kinneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x3-granddaughter) kinetu, kinnetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x3-grandson) kinetang, kinnetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x4-grandchild, non-binary great-x4-grandchild or great-x4-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x5-grandchild | sesneta, sezneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x5-granddaughter) sesnetu, seznetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x5-grandson) sesnetang, seznetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x5-grandchild, non-binary great-x5-grandchild or great-x5-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x6-grandchild | setneta, seneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x5-granddaughter) setnetu, senetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x5-grandson) setnetang, senetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x6-grandchild, non-binary great-x6-grandchild or great-x6-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x7-grandchild | oineta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x7-granddaughter) oinetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x7-grandson) oinetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x7-grandchild, non-binary great-x7-grandchild or great-x7-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x8-grandchild | novneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x8-granddaughter) novnetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x8-grandson) novnetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x8-grandchild, non-binary great-x8-grandchild or great-x8-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x9-grandchild | deneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x9-granddaughter) denetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x9-grandson) denetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x9-grandchild, non-binary great-x9-grandchild or great-x9-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x10-grandchild | onzneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x10-granddaughter) onznetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x10-grandson) onznetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x10-grandchild, non-binary great-x10-grandchild or great-x10-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| great-x11-grandchild | dozneta (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = great-x11-granddaughter) doznetu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = great-x11-grandson) doznetang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex great-x11-grandchild, non-binary great-x11-grandchild or great-x11-grandchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| sibling of parent | tia (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = aunt) tiu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = uncle) tiang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = auntcle / intersex or non-binary sibling of parent or sibling of parent whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| child of sibling of parent | prima (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = female cousin) primu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = male cousin) primang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = intersex cousin, non-binary cousin or cousin whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| child of sibling | sobrinya, subrinya (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = niece) sobrinyu, subrinyu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = nephew) sobrinyang, subrinyang (terestra / intersex and kadmang / non-binary = nibling / intersex or non-binary child of sibling or child of sibling whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| spouse | muleh (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = wife) maridu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = husband) sposu (intersex spouse, non-binary spouse or spouse whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| married | + kazadu to spouse term(s) above (gender-neutral) |
| separated, estranged | + largadu to spouse term(s) above (gender-neutral) |
| divorced | + separadu to spouse term(s) above (gender-neutral) |
| widowed | biuba (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = widow) biubu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = widower) biubang (intersex widowed person, non-binary widowed person or widowed person whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| parent-in-law | sogra (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = mother-in-law) sogru (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = father-in-law) sograng (intersex parent-in-law, non-binary parent-in-law or parent-in-law whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| child-in-law | nora (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = daughter-in-law) jeru (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = son-in-law) joru (intersex child-in-law, non-binary child-in-law or child-in-law whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| parent of child-in-law | beisan, beisang (gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) |
| sibling-in-law | kunyada (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = sister-in-law or transsister-in-law) kunyadu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = brother-in-law or transbrother-in-law) kunyadang (intersex sibling-in-law, non-binary sibling-in-law or sibling-in-law whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| romantic partner (afisi) | amurozu (romantic or sexual partner, gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) noiba (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = girlfriend) noibu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = boyfriend) noibang (intersex romantic partner, non-binary romantic partner or romantic partner whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| sexual partner (wenza) | amurozu (sexual or romantic partner, gender-neutral + jenis/jenta) amiga (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = female sexual partner) amigu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = male sexual partner) amigang (intersex sexual partner, non-binary sexual partner or sexual partner whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| intimate romantic or sexual relationship | par, mpar (couple, pair, two people) trar (throuple, three people) kuar (quad, four people) kalar (moresome, more than four people) |
| polyamorous | + kakualzu (gender-neutral) |
| godparent, witness or sponsor to baptism (if Christian) or assimilation into the Kristang community (if ethnic-identity oriented) | komadri, kumadri (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = godmother) kopadri, kumpadri (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = godfather) koadri, kuadri (intersex godparent, non-binary godparent or godparent whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
| godchild | filiada (femi / female and aurora / male-to-female = goddaughter) filiadu (machu / male and elios / female-to-male = godson) filiadang (intersex godchild, non-binary godchild or godchild whose jenis/jenta is not known to or not a focus for the speaker) |
Acknowledgement and recognition of one’s kandrisanggi and the complex, painful, bittersweet, tragic and/or beautiful relationships with them is essential for developing a strong and stable emotional core, primarily because recognition of one’s kandrisanggi is essential for processing one’s trumenteza impegra or intergenerational trauma (literally “perfect trauma” or “invulnerable trauma” in Kristang). The ideal state of being with one’s kandrisanggi as suggested by the Osura Krismatra and Kristang philosophy is a fully restored, balanced, nuanced and lifegiving relationship with all members of one’s family that is centered around agentic individuation and respect for one another as full, complete, independent individuals able to make their own choices and express their own identities who can then authentically in return contribute to the greater collective of the family.